Born with Potential, Shaped by Society: How to Find Strength When You Feel Like an Outsider
Author: Kristina Rautek Potocnik, BA (Hons) Ed. Rehab., HDip Early Childhood Studies, MA Early Intervention & Inclusion, Cert. Play Therapy | SI | ASD | Reflexes, ongoing MSc SLT
Born with Potential, Shaped by Society: How to Find Strength When You Feel Like an Outsider
There are moments in life when we feel like we don’t belong. This can happen when we move to a new country, start a new job, become a parent, or go through a big change that makes us question who we are. Even though we are all born with the potential to grow and succeed, the world around us sometimes makes us feel like we’re not good enough, or like we have to hide parts of ourselves to be accepted.
These feelings often show up in small ways. We might start holding back our ideas, staying quiet in group settings, or changing our behaviour to fit what others expect. Over time, this can lead to a sense of disconnection—from ourselves and from others. We may begin to doubt our own voice, our value, or our right to feel at home in a new place or role.
But this doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. These feelings are often the result of pressure from outside, not from who you truly are inside.
The first step in finding your way back is self-awareness. Ask yourself: “Why do I feel this way?” and “Are these thoughts coming from me—or from what the world expects of me?” This simple reflection can help you see what truly matters to you and reconnect with your inner values.
It also helps to question old beliefs. Maybe you were told you need to act a certain way to be accepted or successful. Maybe you feel like you need to do things “perfectly” to be seen as a good parent, partner, or employee. But are these beliefs really yours? Or were they given to you by others? Letting go of pressure and choosing your own path can bring freedom and peace.
When you feel like an outsider, it’s easy to forget how far you’ve come. But the truth is, you’ve already handled challenges, adapted to changes, and kept going in hard moments. These are signs of real strength. Your experiences, your values, and your ability to keep moving forward all make you who you are.
Surrounding yourself with people who support and understand you is also important. Whether it's friends, family, or a local community, being around others who respect your true self can help you feel grounded and accepted.
Letting go of what others expect and listening to your own needs takes courage. But that courage opens the door to feeling at home—in your own life, in your new environment, and in your own skin.
So, what can you do today?
Start by reminding yourself that your value doesn’t depend on fitting into someone else’s expectations. You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be true to yourself. Your potential is already inside you. You simply need to give yourself permission to live it.
We are all born with potential. How we grow, how we connect with ourselves, and how we build a life of meaning—that is in our hands.
Start now. You are enough. You deserve to feel strong, real, and at home—wherever you are.
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